


Long Nights

by copland_mechanism



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Canon Rewrite, During Canon, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Intimacy, Missing Scene, Multi, She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018) Season 5 Spoilers, post-episode: s05e06 Taking Control
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-30
Updated: 2020-07-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:55:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25609222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/copland_mechanism/pseuds/copland_mechanism
Summary: The squad have landed on a nearby moon to plan their return to Etheria. Working in shifts to cover Entrapta while she works on a jamming beacon to cover the landing on their home planet, Glimmer and Catra are left to rest on the ship. But the prospect of coming home brings up bad memories for both of them, and rest won’t come.Takes place mid-S5, before the return to Etheria. The premise and character dynamics bend canon – the changes assume that a) the journey from Krytis to Etheria takes longer than in show canon, b) Bow’s issues with Glimmer are not as resolved after ‘Stranded’, c) Catra is still more guarded with Bow and Glimmer after 'Taking Control'/'Shot in the Dark'. I mostly thought that this was a fun and interesting stage of Catra and Glimmer's relationship to explore, and that was more important to me than fitting it perfectly into the show's canon.
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Adora/Glimmer (She-Ra), Catra/Glimmer (She-Ra)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 34





	Long Nights

Glimmer turned over again, shifted the blanket, pulled it forward, hugged it, lay flat under it, rolled onto her back. Nothing helped. The berth was comfortable enough – worse than what she had grown up with, significantly better than her previous arrangement – but sleep would not come. She went back to her right side and found herself confronted again by the room’s giant window, where Etheria was framed among the stars and the yawning emptiness of space. Etheria shone like a star in itself; Entrapta had told them that its surface reflected the light from other stars, making it seem to glow of its own accord. It should have been beautiful. Instead, its shine was broken up by the shape of Horde ships, sharp and bright. And even from here, Glimmer saw where violence had branded the landscape, where forests had been destroyed, where lakes and rivers were choked with wreckage, where rolling plains had whitened into wasteland.

She saw her mistakes, written on their home.

Eventually, she stood up and threw the only tiny sparks she could muster. Walking would at least distract her a little; she could eat something, maybe. She shielded her eyes to keep them from adjusting to the light of the corridor, and walked uncertainly towards the hold. Footsteps passed her by and she turned to look, blinding herself for a moment. 

“Catra?” she called. 

The reply was brief: “Sparkles.” 

By the time Glimmer could see through the haze, she had vanished around a corner. 

Rummaging through the ancient supplies in the hold, Glimmer looked for something that appealed. The food was all designed to last, not to thrill. Adora had labelled the boxes as best she could so they didn’t have to come running for a translator every time they ate, but a lot of the names were completely useless. She squinted at Adora’s handwriting. “Protein cereal mix” didn’t appeal; “Emergency sustenance block – two days” left so much to the imagination that it was worse than knowing. Entrapta ate nothing but snacks, so most of the remnants were raw ingredients and rations. Finally, on the lower shelves, she found a half-empty box labelled “Dried berry and nut mix,” not exactly what she’d been craving, but something she could eat without cooking or thinking.

She wandered the ship, eating berries from a forgotten planet. They had fallen into shifts for who would sleep and who would keep watch more or less automatically. Glimmer had never actually seen Entrapta sleep, so the four of them split the time. Bow had paired with Adora without any discussion. Things were better than they had been when she first got back, but Glimmer hadn’t spoken to Bow since leaving Krytis, and had barely seen him outside the moments when they passed on the bridge, with him going for rest and her rising as tired as she’d gone to bed. She didn’t even know if a conscious decision had been made, but it hurt the same whether he was avoiding her by choice or by impulse. And Catra wasn’t talkative without Adora around.

Glimmer found her on the bridge. Even when it was empty, Catra wouldn’t sit in the pilot’s – in Adora’s – chair; she was sprawled, half-sitting, across the console, looking out at Etheria.

“You’re not sleeping either?”

Catra looked round and flicked her tail.

“We’re in space, Sparkles,” she replied, gesturing at the view. “It doesn’t matter when I sleep.”

She walked over and leant on the console next to Catra. She went to put a hand on her shoulder, then pulled back and rubbed her own arm in embarrassment. 

“It matters that we do sleep.” 

She offered her the food she’d been snacking on, but Catra turned up her nose after a glance at the label. Glimmer shrugged, and shook it at her again.

“There’s not much else, you know.”

Met with silence, she kicked her feet under the console. Catra barely looked at her.

“What’s keeping you up, Catra?”

Still nothing. Catra perched on the corner with deliberate stillness, just her tail twitching back and forth in the air. 

“Looking forward to being home?”

Catra stiffened at that, and lowered her head a touch. Despite years of practice studiously ignoring Adora, she couldn’t let it lie. “Are you?”

Glimmer tightened her grip on the console. “I… don’t know. I look down there and I all I see is everything I ever did wrong. At least out here you guys are the only people who know how stupid I was…”

Catra gave a grim smirk, “And we’d never run out of places to run away to.”

There was a long moment where Glimmer didn’t know what to say. Since being off-world she had felt heavy, and with no connection to Etheria she wasn’t just powerless, but constantly aware of the empty space where her magic should have been. But hearing Catra talk about what they – we – could do together sparked something that filled that gap. 

And seeing Etheria in the distance made her think of everyone who was still there. How could she make things right? With Mermista, whose home had been destroyed because of her incompetence, with the others she’d thrown aside to follow Shadow Weaver’s advice? With Micah? After so much time learning to live without him, how could she go back when the first thing he’d hear would be how she failed, how she let everyone down? Running might not free her of those memories, but at least those people would never have to see her again.

She exhaled lightly, almost a laugh, and looked back to Catra, “You ever get sick of thinking?”

Catra rubbed the back of her neck, squinting out at Prime’s fleet, then gave a slight smile, “All the time. Can you imagine how easy things would be if we were all as dumb as Adora?”

This time, when she and Catra laughed, it was genuine, “I know, right? I don’t get how she’s always moving forwards, and even when she gets it wrong she doesn’t stop, and she ruins things but she fixes  
them, and…” Glimmer sighed, “Can you imagine her losing sleep like this?”

And with that they fell silent and sad, and Catra said “Yes,” and Glimmer agreed.

From somewhere in the ship, a deep creaking sound split the quiet between them. Catra’s ears shot up, and her deliberate ease hardened into caution. “What was that?”

Glimmer frowned at her, “It was only a noise, Catra. Probably nothing. You’re just tired.”

She shook her head, “I’m going to look. This ship doesn’t just make noises, not without Entrapta on board.” And she sprang away, shoulders raised, into the dim corridors.

“Catra!” Glimmer called after her and stood up to follow, staggering for a moment as blood and the weight of exhaustion rushed to her head, “Catra!”

Half-jogging a few steps behind, Glimmer noticed how differently Catra moved when she was tired; her wary, poised gait quickened and became more ragged, she moved off her claws and onto her heels, her footfalls were heavier, and she walked with a hand on the wall rather than striding down the middle of the walkway. The noise that had disturbed them before had gradually changed its timbre, from a low rumble into the thrum of machinery. Glimmer caught up and touched Catra’s shoulder. She flinched slightly at the touch, but not away.

“Catra, slow down. What are we even looking for?”

Catra ignored the question. She had lowered her head and crouched slightly, listening intently. Glimmer’s hand was still on her shoulder when she asked, “Do you know where we are?”

Glimmer looked around. She had been following Catra, and that had taken all her limited attention. The corridor wasn’t familiar. The markings on the wall were similar to those elsewhere on the ship, with seams in metal plating fading in and out of the First Ones’ strange script, and offered no direction. She straightened up – still a little shorter than Catra – and laughed nervously, “We can just go back the way we came, right? Nothing to worry about.” 

As they turned to look back, flecks of light in different colours shot past them down the corridor. Catra yelped and jumped aside, almost slipping until Glimmer caught her around the ribs. She looked up at Glimmer for a second then shook herself away with a snarl.

Glimmer folded her arms, “What? Not scared of some sparkles, are you?” 

Catra flushed and stepped back, “Shut up! That wasn’t funny the first time!” Glimmer kept laughing until she repeated herself with greater urgency, “No, really, shut up! Do you hear that?” 

Glimmer didn’t have Catra’s hearing, but the noise they’d been following had changed again. The electrical buzzing had subsided and now, just at the edge of perception, she could hear… voices? She frowned and looked around. Her breath felt shallow and weak. 

Catra was still staring straight ahead with her eyes half-closed, wholly focussed on listening. She thought she felt the air moving through her fur, even though the ship couldn’t possibly have a breeze. Instinctively she dropped to all fours. She could still feel the hum of the ship’s engine through her fingertips, but something in the floor’s texture had changed. She frowned and opened her eyes a crack, then shot upright and staggered backwards into Glimmer.

The ship’s smooth, iridescent floors were gone, replaced with the textured green and black of the Fright Zone. 

Catra shrank further back, feeling Glimmer’s shallow breaths behind her. “How are we here?” 

Glimmer saw that Catra’s fur was on end, and frowned. She concentrated and dug for magic, flexing her fingers experimentally. Nothing but the same feeble sparks. “We’re definitely still in space. It must be some kind of illusion. Besides, it’s not like the Fright Zone is even really there anymore, not since… you know…”

Catra yanked Glimmer aside as two Horde guards rounded the corner. She reached out and brushed her claws into them, and was met with the familiar shimmer of a hologram. She felt Glimmer’s hand on her arm. “Hey,” she said, squeezing gently, “It’s not real. Nothing can hurt us here.”

“You don’t know that. I’ve been in these illusions before, and they… they get in your head.”

While Catra was catching her breath, Glimmer peered around the corner and stepped out into the new corridor. She turned back to Catra to ask, “Are these your memories?”

“I don’t know, Sparkles,” she hissed back, running a hand along the back of her head to check her hair hadn’t come back, “I just know I don’t want to be here.” 

Glimmer walked over to a guard and waved a hand in front of their mask. No response. She leaned in closer and peered at the red jacket that was practically the only thing she’d ever seen Adora wear. “Hey Catra,” she asked, “How come they let you customize your uniform…?” 

But Catra had gone.

The door in front of her hissed open, the guard stepped aside and saluted as Shadow Weaver stepped out. The waves of her robe passed through Glimmer with a buzz of static. The doorway opened into darkness, but before it closed behind her, Shadow Weaver was followed by another figure. It clipped through Glimmer too, and left her rubbing her eyes and leaning on the half-real wall as she saw herself, wearing that same red and black coat, walking in tow.

“Catra?!” Glimmer cried out, casting around for where she could have vanished to. She felt sick. Adora had told her that the First Ones’ ruins on Etheria showed her the past. And even though what she saw could not be real, had never happened, it was familiar. It carried the weight of the memories that sat in her stomach and crawled in the back of her mind. Touching the wall again, the shimmer that told her this was a hologram started to seem less real than the world around her. 

Left with little choice, she went after Shadow Weaver.

The sorceress was giving a familiar lecture on the importance of focus, the removal of distractions, but Glimmer hardly heard her words, engrossed by the bizarre sight of herself in Horde garb. What was the ship showing them? The fake Glimmer was unmistakably herself, just a few years younger. The sight was mortifying – Why am I walking like that? Is that what my hair used to look like? – but impossible to ignore. 

“You have power beyond your age, child.” Shadow Weaver’s hand clenched as she said power, making the young Glimmer flinch, “But you will be useless unless you learn to wield it for its proper ends, not these childish games.”

The world span as Glimmer followed them through another doorway, and she found herself looking down at her boots. She heard her voice say, “Yes, Shadow Weaver,” felt her lips move, then glanced back over her shoulder. Nothing there.

“Catra and Adora are your peers, for now,” Shadow Weaver continued, “But you must remember what I have taught you. Their path is not yours. Under my tutelage, you will come to understand a power that you cannot now imagine. And there will come a time when you will have to leave them behind you.”

Glimmer knotted her fingers and tugged at her joints, feeling the swell and flow of magic between her and her teacher. Her mind swam; something wasn’t right, like she wasn’t really here. Shadow Weaver broke off her speech, stopping at the doorway to Glimmer’s quarters.

“Until tomorrow, then. Ensure that I am not disturbed.”

Glimmer could barely utter her compulsive “Yes, Shadow Weaver” before a runic circle had opened under her teacher’s feet and swallowed her away, leaving Glimmer alone in the corridor. 

She went into her quarters and sat down on the bed. The room was bare, empty apart from the single narrow cot and a locker. With nothing better to do until dinner, she opened a spell between her fingers, watching the black flame sputter and dance, its core edged with iridescent pink. In frustration, she flicked it away, adding another mark to a wall already scorched from her practice.

The door opened again and Catra barged in, leaping across the room to perch on Glimmer’s bed. “Hey there, Princess,” she leered, “Was Shadow Weaver mean today?”

Glimmer punched her shoulder lightly, “I told you to drop that stupid nickname. Shadow Weaver uses magic, does that make her a princess?” 

Catra tossed her hair rather than answering outright. “Maybe that’s her big secret! It would explain why she hates us so much. I saw her lecturing you again today. The usual?”

Glimmer stood, happy to perform Catra’s favourite trick. With a controlled gesture, she drew a casting circle around her feet and threw an illusion over herself, knowing it had worked when she saw the expression of pretend shock that Catra still wore every time.

“Must I tell you again, child,” Glimmer boomed in her best portentous voice. The perspective was tricky; Catra was looking up into Shadow Weaver’s mask, well above Glimmer’s actual eyeline. She had learned that she actually had to fix her gaze somewhere around Catra’s hips if she wanted the illusion to look her in the eye, for full effect. “Do you not know that Glimmer is too special and precious and brilliant to be wasting her time on underlings like you?” Catra cackled as Glimmer made the illusion twirl and gesticulate, throwing her robe around herself. With her friend doubled over laughing, Glimmer reached out with tendrils of magical energy and lifted her off the ground as she continued, “We study the ancient secrets of this world, far beyond your puny understanding… the great pinnacle of your service to the Horde will be defending us so we can win this war! Go back to your punch training, insolent child.” 

Her voice cracked with laughter as she strained to hold Catra in the air while maintaining the illusion, and both spells fell apart at once, sending Catra crashing down onto the bed and pulling Glimmer with her, their eyes streaming. Through the tears, she saw Catra smiling and reached out to touch her face. Her hand brushed against her wet cheek. Then, just as suddenly as the touch had sparked along her fingers, the world flickered and twisted and they were back. Catra was in front of her again; her mane of hair dissipated into pixels; they leapt away from each other in shock.

“Ugh,” Catra stood quickly and turned away to wipe her eyes, “What is this?”

Glimmer touched a finger to her face; the tears, at least, had been real.

“I have no idea… I mean, these aren’t memories.”

Catra had composed herself, and now stood upright, running a hand through her hair. She still wouldn’t look at Glimmer.

“Catra… What is it?”

She answered half under her breath, hugging her arm, “There was a rumour going around when I was still with the Horde. Just a rumour! But people used to say that Shadow Weaver had tried to kidnap a princess when they were young,” She exhaled sharply, resisting the memory, “When she was a prisoner in the Fright Zone, she told me more about her old life. I don’t know what got into her, but I was the only one who visited, and she just started spilling about everything, so – she wanted to get at one of the Runestones so badly and she knew that the princesses were the key. I don't know if she ever actually tried it though.”

Glimmer fiddled with her top, twisting the material over her heart, “And she knew my dad, so if she wanted another apprentice…” 

Catra nodded, “I don’t know if she ever really got over what happened with Micah. Shadow Weaver is more sentimental than you’d think… but they must have given up after they got the Black Garnet.”

“But that still doesn’t explain what this place is showing us?”

Catra flicked her head and scratched above her eye to avoid Glimmer’s gaze, “I don’t know, okay? Let’s just try to get out of here. I hate seeing these walls again…” What might have been, she thought.

With the illusion temporarily shattered, they were between the ship’s interior walls again, smooth and crawling with First Ones’ writing. Glimmer looked both ways, then pointed in what she felt was the right direction. “Come on. It’s this way.”

“What makes you think you know?”

Glimmer slowed for a moment, but kept walking, calling over her shoulder, “I don’t, but waiting around isn’t getting us anywhere. Besides, the ship isn’t that big.”

“When I said it’d be easier if we were like Adora, I didn’t mean just wandering off in the first direction you see!”

In contrast with the Horde’s angular corridors, the ship’s walkways were all gentle curves that made it impossible to keep track of which way you were facing, and what would come into view. And then in the distance, Glimmer saw a figure she knew well, and called out, “Hey, Adora!”

And Adora took one step back to turn around, and in that moment Glimmer’s world lurched and Catra was running past her, shouting too. When she caught up to Adora, she saluted – “Force Captain!” – in her most severe tone before laughing and scratching at Adora’s badge.

She laughed and gently pushed Catra away, then looked up at Glimmer and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear, “Oh, Glimmer… what do you want?”

The question took her off guard, and she shifted the staff in her hands, gripping it close against her chest. Shadow Weaver had given it to her, and in its weight she felt how different she from the others she had become, who had all learned to fight with batons and fists, in the fray rather than from a distance. And what did she want?

She kept her eyes down when she responded, “Shadow Weaver wants us to start drilling together more. The sergeant has some exercises set up for us.”

She thought she saw Adora shoot an exasperated glance at Catra before answering, “Sure thing, Glimmer. We’ll meet you there.”

She sighed a little, and felt a reply welling up inside her, but stayed quiet and teleported away.

In the panelled training chamber, Glimmer pulled on her fingers while she waited for the others to get ready. Catra was sitting on a crate by the entrance, flicking and retracting her claws impatiently. Both of them watched Adora pulling her boots on, tapping on the soles, tightening the straps on her gloves, stretching her slender arms. She caught sight of her reflection and pulled her hair tighter, before turning back to her boots. Catra rolled her eyes and gave the sergeant a thumbs-up, who slammed a button on her monitor.

Bots, veiled in holograms, were lifted up through panels on the ground. Adora had picked up her baton and stood ready, while Catra was still sitting, crouched rather than relaxed. Glimmer reached out to her staff and pulled it into her hand, jumping up onto the raised block behind her. The bots shimmered purple and took on the form of princesses and Rebellion soldiers, pixelated arrows drawn.

“Okay guys,” she tensed as she drew her magic through her feet to her fingertips, wrapping her hand in flickering energy, “Keep the ground troops off me and I’ll take care of the princesses.”

“Oh,” Adora groaned, “So we’re fodder again. Hooray for us.”

Glimmer’s voice faltered as she replied, “It’s just an exercise. Do it.” 

She crouched and probed the power coiled at her core. She centred herself around her staff and let it course upwards and throw her into the air over the bots. Darting through their bolts she pulled upright, sparing a glance down at the others to see Adora slam her baton into a Rebellion archer’s ribs, whose hologram buckled and sparked to reveal the bot underneath. Catra sprung back from a kill and landed back-to-back with Adora, the two circling to protect one another.

Glimmer’s magic sparked down her forearms as she returned her attention to the simulated princesses. She sent carefully aimed blasts at either side, then raised walls of black flame to coax them closer together. They threw up shields, and sent brief retorts, but as long as she kept steady it was nothing she couldn’t avoid. 

“Glimmer!” Adora’s voice broke through, “A little help?”

The programme had swarmed them with lesser enemies; they were pinned, pressed close against each other and fighting furiously for the space they still had. Glimmer gritted her teeth in concentration, struggling to hold the spell keeping the holograms in place, and sent a quick barrage to give them some breathing room. 

“You’re welcome!” she shouted after them, earning a glare from Adora. Glimmer barely saw her face fall before the blast caught her in the side, breaking her last thread of focus. Her vision sparkled and she just managed to right herself in the air, breaking her fall with a pad of smoke. The princesses had returned to their planned formation, protecting the queen, but Glimmer was angry now and threw herself forward with a shout of exertion. She opened a snare of runic web and drove it in front of her, forcing a path through to the centre. 

The burning walls flared up again but this time she was inside them, isolated with the leader. There was a shout – Catra’s? – and she turned to look back just as the flames closed, and that was all it took. The princess – no, no, the bot, which was even worse – saw her turn and took its chance with a shot at her shoulder that knocked her out of her spellcasting trance; before she could regain her concentration, it fired again and sent her spiralling downwards. Glimmer’s vision darkened and she recalled Shadow Weaver’s words, knowing this had been a test that she had failed, and all she saw before blacking out was two open wings and a flash of pink.

Glimmer came to with Catra slapping her cheek, “Sparkles? You in there?”

She waved the claws away and propped herself up on her elbow, “I feel like the ship’s making this worse for me than it is for you.”

Catra brushed herself off and laughed to hide her relief, “I thought that one was kind of fun. I don’t mind seeing you eat it sometimes. Reminds me of the old days.”

Glimmer sat up and rubbed her side where she had felt the bot catch her; knowing they weren’t real didn’t soften the blows.

“Are we not going to talk about what this place is showing us?”

Catra shrugged, “I don’t see the problem. It’s just like, you know, dreams. Memories are worse, you know.”

She grasped for a staff that wasn’t there and stumbled. Her hand found a leg and she pulled herself up, to Catra’s protests. “Okay, it’s not real, but it’s weird, right? Like, thinking that I could’ve been in the Horde, that we might just have been…” The image of Adora annoyed to see her was burned into her mind, the glare she shot at her for being ordered around.

“You’re overreacting…And yeah, the Horde was bad, but not all of it,” Catra scratched her ear, facing away from Glimmer, “There were some good times. Me and Adora, back then, we had each other. And you know, we would’ve…” Catra cut herself off and caught sight of Glimmer’s eyes, sly and expectant, before throwing up her hands and breaking away, “Quit it, okay? You’re the one making it weird.” She composed herself for a moment, “It can’t be long until Bow and Adora are back, so let’s just… get through this. Just remember, memories would be worse.”

As she spoke, steam billowed over them and they were standing outside in the open among ruined houses. Horde soldiers fanned out across the ash-stained earth. Staff in hand, Glimmer looked across the battlefield. Everything was going as planned; the village had been caught completely off-guard, and their forces had cleared out the inhabitants before any Rebellion fighters could arrive. Catra was beside her, riding a tank and pointing soldiers to any buildings that hadn’t been properly searched.

Glimmer tapped her staff against the ground and sighed. She had expected more excitement from the mission; there was no fun in rolling in without resistance. What was the point of all that time training under Shadow Weaver if she never put it to use? 

“Hey, Princess,” Catra shouted over the distant explosions, “Race you to the next village?”

She breathed in to answer, but Catra cut her short, shouting, “Adora!” Sure enough, Adora stepped through the smoke, wearing unfamiliar clothes and a stony expression that didn’t fade when Catra jumped at her. “What happened to your uniform, dummy?”

Adora caught her by the wrist and frowned, “What are you doing here?” She looked up at Glimmer, “Both of you?”

“What?” Glimmer was indignant, “We came here to find you! And deal with the kidnappers.”

But Catra and Adora were talking, and their words didn’t reach her through the noise, only what she could see. Catra tried to make her come with them, but Adora was pulling away, she was angry, like always she was convinced she was so right and Glimmer didn’t have time for her. She teleported between them to make her case and make Adora leave, but of course she just wouldn’t listen and Adora grabbed Glimmer’s wrists and tried to argue over her.

“Look at what you’re doing, Glimmer! Think about your power, you could help people, you could try and make things better.”

“We’re here to help you, Adora. Can’t you see that?” Magic snaked and crackled around her as anger took root, “Shadow Weaver wants you back, so we’re taking you back. You’re just wasting our time. What, you leave the Horde for two days and you think you can fix everything?”

There was desperation in Adora’s voice now, “No, no! Don’t you see? Shadow Weaver doesn’t care what happens to us as long as she’s in control. We have to get away! She doesn’t think you’re special, Glimmer, she thinks you’re useful, and as soon as you stop being useful, she’ll leave you behind. Isn’t that what she keeps telling you to do to us?”

Glimmer’s patience snapped. With a flick of her staff, her conjured shadows whipped up around Adora, catching her wrists and ankles to lift her into the air. Terror flooded into Adora's face as Glimmer lifted her into the air and slammed her into a half-collapsed wall. She cried out, her expression of pain etched out in purple light.

“You don't know what Shadow Weaver has planned for me. And I'm not letting you go, whether you want to or not.”

Her hands tightened on the staff in anger, edging the black flame with an opalescent sheen that crackled and burned Adora’s skin; she and Catra both shouted in pain and fear for Glimmer to stop, but the choice was made. No matter what they said, she would not leave Adora behind.

Through her rage she saw the glint of a weapon in Adora’s hands, heard a cry and then was blind again, her spell splintered between her hands in a flash of dazzling light and explosive blonde hair, and as the golden light washed over her she felt the grip of the shadows ebb and drain away. 

She woke up. 

Entrapta was standing over her, log recorder in hand, brimming with excitement. She looked from Glimmer to Catra, obviously making a mental note of the tears in their eyes.

“It’s brilliant, isn’t it?” she exclaimed, gesturing at the seemingly empty room they now found themselves in.

Catra scowled in disbelief, “You did this? Why? What is this?”

“Well, I didn’t do anything except make it work. I think it’s a variation of the First Ones’ hologram technology, but I found it in Darla’s old subroutines. It’s designed to let you experience hypothetical scenarios as if they were real. Isn’t that incredible?”

Catra looked over at Glimmer in disbelief, who rubbed her temples and asked, “But… why did it show us that?”

Her words didn’t register. “My current hypothesis is that the First Ones developed the technology for the purpose of experimentation – you could use it to test out anything without risking, you know, untold destructive consequences. Darla’s records suggest that by the time Mara was using this ship, the simulator was mostly used for entertainment, but it explains how the First Ones could have developed something like the portal machines without annihilating the fabric of space and time…” The conversation seemed to catch up with her, “What did it show you?”

Glimmer shot a panicked look at Catra, who jumped in to explain, “Nothing, nothing, okay? It was just an old battle simulation, or something.”

Entrapta’s eyes still lit up, “Fascinating! I’m going to dive into the records we still have… With Darla’s computer, I should be able to create my own programmes if I can figure out the code, and with that I could run any experiment I wanted, combine it with my own simulation software…” She kept talking as she walked out of the room, turning back only as an afterthought, “Thanks for testing it for me, by the way!”

Glimmer barely managed to say “You’re welcome” before the exhaustion caught up with her, and she slumped to the ground.

“Come on,” Catra was looking down at her with something like sympathy, “The First Ones suck, but you still need some rest.” Glimmer didn’t move, so Catra sat down next to her.

“I’m…” she looked away, her expression hard, “I’m sorry you had to see that. I know I said that we had some good times with the Horde, but… even how it happened with me, that wasn’t one of them.”

Still silence. Catra shifted back and forth in place, then stood and turned to leave, “Come on. Adora’s back on the ship now, we can go and see her ourselves. It wasn’t real. Adora never left you.”

Glimmer reached up and caught Catra by the arm before she could go.

“Didn’t she?”

Neither of them spoke. Glimmer swallowed, all too aware of the sweat on her hand around Catra’s wrist, remembering all the times she’d thought about what she would say in this moment and how she had thought she was brave, and how that squared with now, where she lacked the courage to look up and risk seeing the expression on her face. “Look, Catra, I don’t…” her voice faltered and she tightened her grip on her arm, conscious of Catra’s quickened pulse against her thumb, “I don’t understand what it is you and Adora have, alright? All this, I know that it isn’t my past, and I know that I can’t ever be the same as you are to her – but whatever it is, I want to be a part of it too, if… if you’ll have me.”

Only then, when she fell silent, could she look up to see that Catra had crouched down and her eyes had softened. Her hand pulled free from Glimmer’s and came up behind her head, drawing her close so their foreheads touched. “Hey, we–” she stopped, pressing her fingers into the back of Glimmer’s neck, before correcting herself, “I want you, Sparkles.”

So Glimmer embraced her, exhaling so hard it was almost a sob, and kissed her cheek. As she held her body close to her own, her breathing steadied and the world righted itself and she felt full again and spoke softly into the back of Catra’s neck,

“Stay with me a while. I can rest, now.”


End file.
